I have just laid my little Kira down for a nap. When I peeked in this morning and smiled at her, she was so happy to see me she squealed. I pulled her out of her bed and we sat on the sofa for nearly quarter an hour where she just clung to me so tightly. She didn’t understand what happened to me, where I went, and why I was gone. It was her limit of time that I could be gone, that’s what we all agree on around here. All morning she wouldn’t let go of my hand. When we went to do errands, I strapped her on my back so she could know I was close to her. I am a mama that has children on two continents. It’s no easy task to be a good mother to all.
When I dragged myself in last night the boys were all waiting up for me to hug me and make sure I was really ok, and I am. This morning they were eager to know what’s for dinner! Boys and their bellies, they really think in tandem. Being home is such a good feeling.
I slept on the plane most of the way around the world. When I got home, I showered, and climbed into bed for more sleep. When I woke up this morning it was in time to catch up with Craig on the patio with coffee before the boys found their way to us preparing for their own day at school. Commanding my post in my own home is a very important job and I love it. But I know better than ever that I have left an intense fraction of my life behind in Uganda. Learning to do them simultaneously, and do it well is going to be challenging but rewarding.
I’ve been told to rest, but that’s impossible. I’m eager to go back to work and swim with the current that is moving rapidly in Uganda, despite my absence. I learned that John Mary, my lawyer, and Abdul, my right hand in this situation, have spent all day running around getting evidence for the police to prepare their case. Adams was able to post bond, and will be seen next Monday. I’m pacing my floor waiting to get reports from them.
I opened a bank account in Kampala so that I can wire money to myself to cover costs in Uganda. That was one of my problems before I discovered all the misuse of funds, I needed to send money through Adams. Now I can send money to myself and be able to pay bills there from my own account.
I anticipated feeling an avalanche of emotion hit me once I stepped into the safety of my home, but I don’t feel the pressure of it yet. I walked the airport for hours thinking about the full impact of the week’s activity, and once or twice I thought maybe I should cry, but it hasn’t happened yet. I find my courage and strength from God, and reading the proverbs of the day has been a guiding light. I miss Ellen and Herb’s daily devotional, so first thing I did this morning when I turned on my computer is order a few of them. I really want it tomorrow!
I feel a little helpless here in America when the investigation is on at full speed in Uganda. I have a lot of faith and trust in my team who are working hard in my place. God has placed this cause of injustice towards orphans into the hearts of many. I might be leading the way and have the final say, but I am not alone in the outrage. I’m not alone in the fight. I am so thankful for the team of great minds God has given us to fight this battle.
As today is the 24th of October, I read Proverb’s 24, this is a discipline I have enjoyed for many years. Each day a verse jumps out like I’ve never seen it before. Today there were two that were so appropriate.
v. 3: “A wise man has great power and a man of knowledge increases strength, for waging war you need guidance, and for victory many advisors.”
v.17-18: “…do not gloat when your enemy falls…”
The guidance I can find in Proverbs is priceless as I struggle to walk on the narrow path laid out by God. The only thing I know for sure is His way is better than mine. I did not have a moment of anxiety in this entire ordeal because I was operating under God’s strength. I feel no stress now, and I don’t anticipate any. I know this is His battle to fight. He sent me home, so it’s time for me to sit tight and see what He does next.
Before I go, there was one more verse that kept me sober this morning: Matt 5:44 “But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your father in heaven.”
So I prayed very carefully and sincerely for Adams and Elitia. I know I am their enemy. I hope they leave Phiona alone.
One more…because it is so good…Matt 10:16: “I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.” I have to believe that is a good conclusion and summary to my adventure in Uganda last week. I have always been devoted to learning my bible, but this week I discovered something about the words found there: there’s so much power in it. I found myself desperately clinging to guidance from the bible. I’d wonder “what did Jesus say about this…” and leaf through until I found it. I’d crave verses from friends to encourage me in the fight. I’ll never hold my bible the way I used to. Now I hold it like a sword.
Tomorrow I’m going to try and formulate some sort of plan where I can summon help for these children in this emergency situation. I’m going to need a lot of help. The mess left to clean up could be overwhelming, but I know God is a God of order and he’ll provide.