What’s the secret to our family’s cohesiveness and relationship success?
I hope I can approach this topic with some humility and yet admit we are on a good course and enjoying our relationships and though there’s nothing perfect we are thriving, not just surviving, and I can trace it to two distinct sources. Craig and I are both separately devoted to our personal relationship with God and knowing Him better on a daily basis by learning from the bible. That’s the first constant of our marriage. I can’t remember a time when Craig wasn’t reading his bible early in the morning. And he probably can’t remember a time when there wasn’t a bible and a prayer journal on my lap while I take the morning coffee.
The second constant is that Craig and I take good care of our marriage. We treat it like the most delicate plant in the garden constantly assessing its needs and adjusting the care to keep it thriving. The way we take care of our marriage is very much like how the majority of american’s take care of their pets. Have you noticed how crazy we are about our animals in this country? I’m in that category. I think of how devoted I am to Lucy daily, hourly, and happily and it really can be said that I feel the same way about my relationship with Craig. I’ll speak for him and say because of the way he treats me that he must feel the same way.
Often in life I’ve asked him what are your passions? What hobbies do you want to pursue? He can be really simple and have none and be quite content. But I continued to corner him and pester him until he produced one and he said, “It’s you. I’m passionate about our relationship”. I’m his spice. That makes me feel so honored, and let’s face it girls we want to know we are loved like that.
Men need to know they have our respect. Though I tease him endlessly the true undercurrent is that I wholeheartedly respect him and show it more than I say it. ( Ok, I need some leniency for sticking my tongue out now and then.) But he knows for sure with no doubts ever that I respect him.
Here’s a few tips about love and respect: BE
- attentive and sensitive
- willing to share burdens
- submitted to God
- flirtatious with eachother
- careful to keep a sense of humor in all things at all times
- clear in communication: say what you mean but don’t be mean!
- willing to change your mind
It’s nice that we can anticipate being that old couple that holds hands in public, sits on a bench each night to watch the sunset, and laughing together riotously so often our bellies stay toned. That’s not accomplished without constant care and attention. It’s worth it.