I survived the week with a commuting husband. It was a staggering start and a brave finish. Craig began his new job this Monday. So Sunday afternoon he made his first three hour commute, had dinner with the boss, and then jumped in with both feet on Monday morning. I could hear the smile in his voice all week long. In fact, I was quite sure he was skipping while we chatted.
His delight makes it all worth it for what I managed on this end. We know the familiar saying…when the cat is away…the mice will play. I’ve been here before because the cat used to travel so much that it was quite similar to this current situation of commuting only he stayed in hotels and rode airplanes rather than driving to an apartment.
I learned in those days that the children’s behavior which is normally kept contained while dad is here gets spilled a little when he’s away. It’s a mess I thought might be best to prevent than clean up. Let’s just say we only had a little spill. I had a big feisty, finger in the face talk with them and commissioned their father to reinforce it this weekend. The one thing I won’t tolerate while I play both mom and dad during the week is to have to ask for something twice. I receive that as passive aggressive disobedience and absolute disrespect. They got the message loud and clear. By Thursday there were boys asking what they could do to help me. I was thankful they could see and appreciate how hard I am working. We smoothed out a good working rhythm for temporarily managing without the cat.
Craig asked me,” how is it going?” I said, “well, I have to make my own coffee and I don’t even know how to set it to be ready at four. The mice thought about playing but I scared them away. There’s no one to put away my glasses when I fall asleep with my book. Locking up the house takes ages. I forgot to put the trash out. I have to remember what it’s like to drive in the dark for late night pickups. But making the bed is much easier. How are you?”
He said, “I am already well known here. I addressed my team and explained I am somewhat of an introvert so don’t be offended if I don’t socialize much. Someone responded, ‘you might be an introvert but your wife is not! We’ve all been reading her blog.’”
We both howled with laughter because they know me better than they know him. Ha! Here’s the important truth: Craig is my most loyal supporter of my hobby. He reads it every day and always approves. Truthfully, he’s my muse. I often write wondering how I can make him feel. It’s a little bit like a love letter in disguise. It would never occur to me to share something that would anger or embarrass him because I have the utmost respect for my man. So, he didn’t mind at all that his team knows all about our family and my quirky ways. I celebrate the way my husband loves me by giving me the freedom to fly just as I am. He has never ever suggested I ought to be one bit different. It wouldn’t occur to him to try and control me or manipulate me. I count that as a great joy and relief. The way he loves me is so big it reaches the sun and the core of the earth at the same time. Because I am loved well, first by God, and second by my husband, I can endure and achieve anything.
…a few quotes about love…
- Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. ~1 Corinthians 13:4-7
- To love someone is to seek his or her best and highest good.
- When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece. ~Charles Reade
- Don’t underestimate love at first sight. Many of us might not pass a second inspection.
- Love is said to be blind, but I know lots of fellows in love who can see twice as much in their sweethearts as I can. ~Josh Billings
- I have learned that only two things are necessary to keep one’s wife happy. First let her think she is having her way. And, second, let her have it. ~Lyndon B. Johnson ( I love Lady Bird Johnson and her passion for nature and gardening)
- Love is a form of insanity that makes a girl marry her boss and work for him the rest of her life without salary.
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