There are five guys against me here in this household, unless you count my sweet Lucy, our three year old bulldog. For her first two years she was a real girl, but since we got her fixed, she no longer has the girl mood swings that happened twice a year around a full moon. Back in those days we could all tell when she was going into heat because she acted needy one minute, loving the next, and then ornery as a spider with a broken web.
The kids would scratch their head and wonder what happened to our sweet Lucy. It was great for them to see hormones really do affect the mood of a female. Even better was when the heat came for her and she had to wear a diaper with a feminine hygiene pad inside it. When she needed to go outside to relieve herself the boys all had to take their turns removing the diaper and changing her pad. I wish I had a video of that now. Only Donny was really a teenager then, and he wants to study medicine, so it didn’t phase him at all. The others did it with a pitiful face and alot of dramatic antics.
The great lesson in that experience was for them to see it’s natural for a female to have moods that swing like Jane on a vine crossing the jungle. It’s just part of life when you have a girl in the house.
When it’s mama though, I get “the look” passed around behind my back. They know better than to come out and say “Are you having PMS?” That’s high treason to the boy code. And they aren’t quite sure what an unpredictable woman would do in response to an accusation like that. They are smart to keep to their code by exchanging raised eyebrows, and screeching expressions without my seeing it. They also have an effective disappearing act during those days. It’s part of the male survival tactic.
Because I’m alone here, sometimes I think perhaps I am crazy like they think. For all they know they’ve got it really easy with this woman. They should be thanking God they out rank me five to one. But that is going to change. I’m eager to have Kira come join my rank as special female in a house of all boys. With two against five someday we’ll show them what PMS is really all about.
For the record: this female tolerates the testosterone loaded war games, competitions and muscle contests without much fuss.