Posted by: tonyalatorre | April 8, 2010

Our Adoption from Uganda is on the move!


Our adoption is on the move. Yes it is. During spring break I mentioned we went for our fingerprinting for the FBI check. After we humbled ourselves for a criminal check we were told it would be another three months before we should expect to hear anything. Well, that sent me onto other projects to keep my mind far from dwelling on my impatience. It didn’t keep Craig from praying daily for an early response, which might explain how three weeks later we received approval from the immigration services to adopt an orphan from Uganda. Woo-hoo. (We’ve “been determined to be worthy of parenting another child.” Oivey….like I need my government to tell me that. Crikey.)

Receiving the news is a feeling I won’t forget. I didn’t wait to get home before opening the envelop and reading the letter. I opened it right there in my van where our mail boxes for the neighborhood are located. It was sweet relief, and the promise of progress. A bright horizon, a lifting of gloom, a renewed energy for this adventure…. suddenly I believed again it could happen without years of waiting.

Craig and the boys were so excited. It is a wonderful family experience to share as we hope, wait and desire to put a little sister into this mix. They are as eager as we are, just in different ways. But no one more than Jack, and I believe this more so after a conversation we had during a snuggle while he was prolonging his bed time. It went like this:

Our Jack is a deep thinker.

“Mama I need my little sister, you know.”

“Why is that?”

“Because my brothers are all going to college a long time before me and I don’t want to be home alone.”

“Yeah, I can understand that…. but, when it’s her turn to be alone, do you think she’ll mind?”

“Oh. Well, I don’ know, maybe you can go get another little sister for her.”

“Maybe.”….(probably not ~ I’m already going to be the grandma in her kindergarten class!)

Anyway, what I gather from the reaction from our team is that everyone already loves her and we don’t know a thing about her yet. Which brings me to what’s next for us. Our social worker from our adoption agency sent our availability to the orphanage for babies in Uganda today, so they will begin the work of matching us to our little girl.

The timing of this is entirely unpredictable because the law requires two factors: the baby needs to have lived in the orphanage for six months prior to being released, and they need to have put an advertisement into the papers there searching for family to claim the child. So, if there is a girl who has only been there a couple months, that means we have to wait for her to finish her six months. The other odd bit of interest is that there are more boy orphans in Uganda than girl orphans. Weird? Well, it has to do with inheritance laws. A boy takes his father’s land. A girl take’s her husband’s land. I suppose the father’s don’t want their sons taking anything.

The reality for us is that we are relieved we don’t have to choose her. We believe God has done that for us and we are eager to see his plans unfold before our eyes. So now we wait for news from the adoption agency that we’ve been matched with our daughter.

Meanwhile the legal stuff in Uganda is creeping and resting. Let’s just understand that the way time is perceived in Uganda is unlike anywhere else. There is no such thing as a hurry. So once we have received our referral we still could face delays because of the legal holdups.

Knowing who she is isn’t going to make it easier for me to be patient. It’s going to require a significant amount of faith and God’s presence in my walking through it so I don’t go a little crazy. But knowing who she is does make it intimate and personal and we can begin to think about her and pray for her and plan for her in specific ways. That will be marvelous.

A child in a village in Uganda, she was coming to have a look at the mzungus. (white people)

Now a quirky note on the difference between Craig and I when we receive news. He is immediately writing out an email. Not me, I withdraw and go deep into my sensations, sorting them, thinking about it all and filtering my emotion from my thoughts so I can understand all of it. I need to be alone and not talk about it for a little while. Then I am ready to communicate it. If you want instant immediate notification you might ask to be on Craig’s email list. Otherwise, you can get the fleshed out version here about twenty-four hours later. I am ok with the way I am, warts and all. If that’s not ok with you, Craig’s your contact guy. However when we do get news of who she is it will be announced here with her picture. I can assure you he won’t leak that bit of news.

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Responses

  1. Thanks to everyone who has been praying for us and our daughter. God is working His plan, according to His purpose. Please continue to pray for our daughter and the preparation of our hearts to receive her home.

  2. Tonya and Craig,

    I’m so excited about your adoption, and how your boys are so accepting of another sibling. I predict she will never date because she will have five “protectors”, poor thing. Tonya, i love your reflective response–that you ponder on “these things” just as Mary did with Jesus. And Craig, usually it’s the man that is more reserved, so it’s refreshing to experience your enthusiasm toward life. Andy & I tried for 8 heart-breaking years to add to our family and briefly considered adoption, but adoption itself can have devastating effects if it falls through, and our hearts were very fragile and our bank account very empty after that journey. We’re so blessed to have Harrison and have an incredible relationship with him; we are definitely blessed. It took me a long time to not feel envy toward large families and to accept God’s plan for our small family, but look forward to the future of having many grandchildren (in God’s timing!) Blessings to you all, and thank you for sharing your journey with us. Andy & Linda

  3. I didn’t know Craig had an e-mail list! We would love to be on it. I am so happy that there is wonderful forward movement on your adoption!

  4. Praise God for this awsome news! Will continue to pray for her and you all.

  5. Wow!! This are GREAT news!! Thank you for sharing with us Tonya. I love my Jack so much, he is the sweetest boy on earth. I love your 4 boys but I don’t know what it is about Jack that he still my heart every time.
    I relate to the part were you withdraw, I am very much the same way. I will be patient and wait for you to process your feeling and be ready to share them. I love you guys so much and will continue to pray for your baby girl.

  6. I am sorry for my foreign writing. I meant “These are great news”


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